The Path to Womanhood II
IN SHIFTING OUR PERSPECTIVE from a colonial paradigm to a traditional one, we can start to see clearly how serious the fight for a woman to regain her freedom is. The freedom we're exploring is not about the right for us to be like someone else, but to become what we're capable of becoming. The right to be what our culture defines us to be and what can build and re-build civilizations. It's no easy task, but let's try to open
our minds, apply some intellectual effort and see where that takes us. Many of the notions presented are challenging to us women who have been educated in the west. The struggle and sacrifice to become quality women is relentless, but what else is worth all the blood, sweat and tears? At this point, anything would be a step up from the destructive condition we're trying to preserve. In our last discussion, we went in depth, identifying/recognizing the presence of a colonial influence and perspective in our approach to everything. The next step is being honest in re-training and re-educating ourselves away from what's hurting us so that we can lift ourselves back up. If we can accept that perhaps some of the concepts from the last discussion had value, we can move forward.
We have allowed this system to take advantage of our emotions and utilize them against us and our families long enough. However, instead of seeing it as such, we think we are somewhat privileged with all the rights and freedoms that we can use against those we say we love. This is the tactic of control American women have become addicted to. While we're busy trying to turn our husbands into "one of the girls", we forget that we actually have "the girls" to turn to in our times of need. This unnatural behaviour must be taught and passed down if this system is to succeed in keeping us pinned down. This system maintains power over its subjects by targeting women in this way. All the things we find our pride and security in have been catered to us by the system, to the point where we are convinced that we don't even need men at all.
We allow the government to be the entity to assume the role of our companion. It provides for us; we work for it; we let it raise our children, we suffer for it and we support it while not allowing the one we say we love to hold a fraction of this influence. The moment we can't solve a problem of our own the first phone call we make is to the government. We've participated in this cycle far too long to see this problem continue and look the other way. It's time to reclaim who we are and what we are truly made of and it starts with seeing the situation for what it is. This is the only way to determine what the next step will be. The reason we fall so easily into the pitfalls of this circumstance is our lack of guidance and exposure. There is a deliberate trap set to prevent us from moving towards an education that presents an alternative method of growth to what we’re faced with in the western world. No formal education in this country will teach girls how to be young women and young women how to be wives and mothers to an entire community. These are two very important roles that women play, but without being exposed to the principles of womanhood at an early age, the reality of these roles becomes a devastating obstacle for women in the U.S. The most one might encounter is an education that will train any woman to work every day of her life in the rat race to compete with the opposite sex. Consumed with this focus, it is the children and the household that are left open and vulnerable to the government or any third party wishing to manipulate and control it. If we experience any situation that the government has not tailored for us to feel in control, we feel cheated or insecure.
This is a very important aspect because in traditional societies all over the globe, we see how at a young age girls learn the importance of responsibility. Whether it's taking care of a younger sibling or assisting with household duties, young girls are not stripped of their exposure to hard work. This, in turn, prepares them for what it takes to survive in the Natural world. In environments like this, women learn how to be women because the family structure is strong and the value of community and unity are seen right away.
They don't know any other alternatives or shortcuts when it comes to doing what needs to be done. Whatever work is required, it is simply produced. This is the mentality that is valued, and it's what keeps the family and the entire household strong. In these kinds of environments, where everyone is focused on survival and the good of the family, there isn't the quest for a short cut or an easy way out. Here in the US, that is the only quest we know. Since traditional women are exposed to survival and responsibility at an early age by their elders and a strong community of women, all the qualities of womanhood are instilled while they are very young. Even an adolescent will know how to take care of the entire household because the strength of a woman is what allows stability for a father and husband to protect, provide for and secure the household.
If you take a look at the women coming from a traditional paradigm, you cannot help but to reorient your perspective of the world around you. No matter what the task, there seems to be nothing these women cannot do, and it is because of the education and initiation that is protected and passed down generation after generation. At the time when a young woman is ready for marriage and a family of her own, the responsibility is not such a major adjustment because she's been cooking and cleaning and taking care of her younger siblings in the family structure her whole life. This is how our ancestors have gone about it for millennia. We see what works and we see how strong civilizations become when there is a strong family/community structure. Gender definition lies at the core of this structure to support the presence of balance and integrity. It is very important that individuals trying to reclaim their culture understand this notion because, for women, the future depends on us
When we reference a traditional lifestyle or environment, what we are really identifying is a community that is founded on the principle of human quality, intelligence and survival. It takes intelligent people to survive within nature, the elements and the values that our ancestors have preserved for us. The survival is for not just the household, but for the future. It's the survival of these qualities and values that those who understand traditions work hard to preserve.
It takes honesty to see yourself for what you are. In the U.S. we are all raised since birth by a colonial society that has taught us to misrepresent our roles and responsibilities as women. Our power and pride cannot be placed in what we've been offered because we see that it doesn't work. For those of us who argue that it does, let us at least admit that no matter how comfortable we are in our state of mind, it can always use refinement. We will need to detach ourselves from the ideologies that put the role and lifestyle of traditional women down. What will we have to lose by giving ourselves a chance? We are taught that the traditional way of life holds a quality of subservience and is demeaning, etc. If we examine this perspective with even some small amount of intellectual effort we could ask ourselves who was it that put this idea in our minds? For this to be a proposed view, we would have to then be making some sort of comparison. What is it that we are comparing this role to be subservient to? If we say it is subservient compared to the way modern women will go to any length to overpower and challenge a man, which one is the real slave to corruption? We see the obsession women here have to uphold dominance and authority over a man and everything he does while traditionally women are obsessed with quality and survival.
It takes a certain kind of woman to value survival enough to do anything she can to work hard for her family. That particular woman poses a threat to the agenda of a system that insists on being a member in every household. This is because she will stay focused on herself and allow the family father to be just that. With the harmony that is produced from the definition of genders, a household can stand strong on its own and thrive in understanding. There would be no room for a foreign entity to make decisions or intervene in a situation where there is harmony. Whatever obstacles may arise could be handled reasonably and without the influence of political corruption or foreign interest.
Here in the U.S. these women are foreign to us. We see their position and find it difficult to let go of that piece inside us that is too afraid or too arrogant to embrace a cultural aspect that belongs to all women. We fear that the compromise won't allow us to be the women we want to be. If the women we want to be is what this system has set out for us to be, then we have already given up on ourselves. If the women we want to be are the women we need to be, then we will have to start honouring the values that our culture brings. Men are not your enemy to stand against, neither is the woman next to you. It is the evil in ourselves that we will have to wage war against if we want to approach womanhood from a perspective of honesty and cleanliness.
The value of womanhood is something we keep in our hearts and express in our attitude and behaviour towards our community and the world around us. If we help one another, we deserve to be helped. We are here to support the growth and good in one another as sisters working hard to reclaim our identity. There is nothing easy about an adjustment that requires putting down the things we prefer and facing the challenges that demand our transformation. The outcome will be pursuing the things that will guarantee our future, instead of keeping us in a state of desperation and constant suspicion. It's the conflict between what makes sense and the way we live our lives that puts the animosity that we have in our hearts. What's to come is us moving forward.
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